Naked Love

Naked Love by Darnella Ford. This was an outstanding book. Hands down. It was a page turner. I can't get over how intriguing it was. From the first chapter, well the 28th Chapter as the chapters decreases as you read further, I knew this would be one interesting book. I dare not give away the story line but it about love, loss, and betrayal. I think this would be a great selection for a book club because there is just so much you can discuss from any given chapter. It even has guideline questions in the rear of the book just for that reason. Indeed a good read.

My birthday is in 2 days on the 31st. I can't believe the month is over and I'm turning a year older. I can just remember when I was 11 years old running around at my dad's house playing. I remember graduating from junior high, then high school, then dental school. Seems like just yesterday I was turning 21 and now I'm turning 31. Time surely does fly and I don't want to miss anything. I went to see the Bucket List a few weeks ago and it really got me to thinking about life. There was a part where Morgan Freeman mentioned how fast 46 years flew by to him. How he wasn't able to do anything but work and provide for his family. A marvelous movie that I highly recommend you see. My dearest hubby is taking me out of town for a surprise. Part of me is really frustrated because I don't have a clue nor will he give me one that I can go on. I am not as excited about the trip but as the days come in closer, the level of excitement tends to increase. I like control and order. LOL. If I don't know where I'm going, I can't be in control and that makes me very uneasy. Yeah I know, sad. My mother's birthday was yesterday and we went to dinner and had a nice time the family and I. So here's to my birthday! Cheers...

See ya when I return on Sunday. SUPERBOWL. Woohoo!!!!

The Auto Show

Today we decided to attend the Auto Show. The last time I had been to it I was a little girl and was accompanied by my dad. I remember it so well because they had Kit, the Knight Rider car there. Now as an adult I can go a appreciate the time spent there. We arrived around 2 pm and we left at 4:30 pm. Oh it was like a kid in a candy store. I can't count how many times I said the words "oohh". I got a chance to sit in the cars that I know I will never be able to afford to purchase. My personal favorite was the H2. That was a pretty big and spacious truck. I also liked the Lexus cars and trucks. I wasn't really surprised by how comfortable they felt but they truly were comfy. More on the realistic approach, I narrowed my choices down to the Acura RDX and the Land Rover L2. The Range Rover was very nice. Even the Sport Version of it. The Sport wasn't terribly expensive but the more affordable would be the L2. You won't feel like you are being shorted with this purchase as it pretty much has the same features but only smaller. Perfect size for someone like me with no children and usually roll solo or with the hubby. Reasonably priced and luxurious. So out of the two, the L2 would be my first pick. The first car that I got in was the Mitsubishi Eclipse. Convertible. HOT!!!!! I just kept saying how it was sooo me and I got my confirmation by a friendly stranger telling me I should buy it because I looked so good in it. I thanked him agreed. If only I didn't already have a coupe. I'm in the market for a CUV not a roadster. I sat in the Pontiac Solstice as I have been eyeing those in the past. Nice but I don't like the 90 degree angle you sit at. I need to be able to recline a bit and that isn't the car for it. Highlight of the evening was the Aero by Saab. It's a concept car and I am so mad I left my camera. That car left me speechless. I will be on the look out for it in the near future. I left happy with tired feet and a new car scent to take home as a prize. LOL. I can't wait until next year.

Will it work?

I am one week into my post surgery. It was performed one week ago today and I must say I am feeling well. Due to my misunderstanding, it's called Arthroscopy and not Orthoscopy, LOL. Duh! Well that's what it sounded like to me. Anyway. I arrived at the hospital at 1 pm and registered and got settled. The doctor's coworkers (not sure what they are called) came in and spoke to me. The hated IV. I have had the luxury of experiencing this once before and it's not fun or comfortable. Especially when the anesthesiologist can't quite hit the vein. OUCH!!! Painful. After about 7 pokes, he managed to hit the spot. He informed me I had "curly" veins. I wanted to laugh as all I could think about was my hair. You know. Coily. Next was a sonogram of my neck. In the case that I would end up in severe pain afterwards, they could give me an injection in my neck to control the pain. They called it a Block. I know what that means in dental terms so I gathered it was the same concept and it was. Thankfully, I didn't need it. Dr. Lopez told me that there was a possibility that he would have to make an open cut. If he needed to then fine but I don't have scars on my body and wouldn't welcome one of the size he predicted. Turns out, the shoulder only required three samll slits about a 1/2 inch in length. I believe they will leave a mark but what can you do?

I was told it was time and they rolled me away on the bed. "We are going to give you something to make you sleepy now", was the last words I heard. I was happy my husband was there with me. He gave me a kiss before they carted me away and that was all I remembered until it was time to wake up. Again, pain. So much pain that I was on the bed in tears. I was freezing cold and crying. The nurse told me to take some deep breaths because she couldn't give me anything until I started breathing. They had the oxygen going and there were people talking all around me. Not a pleasant waking experience. Finally, I did what she said and got some pain medicine. In walks the hubby but they didn't let him stay long. The worse part is having to use the bathroom coming out of the sleep. You really think you have to go but you don't. She gives me a bed pan. Yes, sexy. To no avail. I told her I can't go. Then suddenly I could. They walked me to the bathroom and made sure I was safe. It felt odd with a stranger in there while you take a leak but I was still incoherent so I didn't mind so much. Aaahhh! Relief and now I can go home. I get back, she asks if I feel like I can get dressed. I said, "Yes" then got dressed. Oh and they warn you of the nausea. That was just awful. The entire ride home I was nauseous and I didn't think I would make it. Hubby stopped to fill my prescription for Percocet and home we went.

Let me just say that I have no idea how one becomes addicted to that drug. Why in the world would anyone want to feel like that. You are literally high. You nod off to sleep at any given moment just to wake up speaking nonsense. No one can make out what you are talking about. Then you nod off again. I felt like a true drug addict under the influence. I could not be held liable for anything I said the two days I was on the pain killer. I was so relieved I didn't need it the rest of the recouperation period. Each day is better and better. I'm out of the sling. I can move it normally again. Almost. There are certain positions that send a jolt of pain through the shoulder but overall I'm great and I hope this turns out to be a successful procedure. Only time will tell now.

Motorcycle Show

I had a really nice weekend. It seems so short due to my daily activities. Friday hubby and I went to Adams Morgan to hear some jazz. It was a nice little quaint spot and the music was very nice. Saturday I went out to the Crossroads Nightclub. It's a spot I frequent for reggae and dancehall. Sunday was the 27th International Motorcycle Show at the Convention Center in DC. It was almost like a kid in a candy store. All types of bikes. Even some that looked sort of futuristic. They displayed a trike and a bike that had two small wheels in the front closely centered in place of one big tire. I sat on some, took some pictures and enjoyed the experience. It was my first time attending and although I felt as if it wasn't a lot to display, it satisfied my hunger. I have been eyeballing a pair of girly riding boots by Icon. I was able to see them in person. Cute but just didn't look that functional. I understand they want to make clothing and accessories for us females and they achieved it but I just think it should be a few more prototypes to come before settling on just one. They had all sorts of vendors there from helmets to jackets to GPS systems. I purchased a fog free spray set. That's one of the downsides of riding with a full face helmet. You tend to fog the shield. They demonstrated how it works on my very own eyeglasses and we were sold. Both the hubby and I can use it and a little goes a long way. After sitting and looking I am all pumped up for the upcoming riding season. Here are a few pictures we took while there.

My run in with the cops

Well another cop. Not my hubby. Ok so I had a spa service appointment early this morning at the Red Door. I chose to go to the location that is far as hell from me. Minimum an hour depending on your speed. I had an appointment at 10 am and I figured I could just leave out at 8:45 am and have a few minutes to spare or to allow for mishaps. Thank goodness I did leave when I did. Minding my business driving along on the beltway. I was doing every bit of 95 mph and just decided to let up a bit. Everything was good. I was on the phone with my girlfriend and bam, I saw the truck posted up on the side of the road perpendicular to the direction I was going. Basically, he was in the cut. By the time I reached him we made eye contact. I knew I was guilty. So I told my girlfriend he was pulling me over and she said, "no maybe he just want to make sure I slowed down". Nah! He pulled onto the road and got in my lane behind me and close to my bumper. Then the lights went off. I got off the phone and pulled over. I was caught. What can I say, I was wrong. I was speeding and I knew I was. We all tend to do it but I was the lucky girl today. He identified himself as Maryland State Trooper. License and registration he asked for. Told me I was going 83 in a 55 mph zone. Ok. So my dear police officer hubby of mine gave me a folder for my wedding gift. It's a black leather folder (what we would call wallet) with a tiny version of his police badge. Same numbers and all. On the other side, you put your i.d. or what have you. I retrieved it from my purse and opened it up in a way that he could see the badge but not blatantly displaying it. I also have yearly FOP stickers on my back windshield as another form of identification. He asked if I was an officer and I replied, "no my husband". He asked for where and I told him. He told me to sit tight he will be right back. He returns with not a smile on his face. The officer informs me that he is letting me off on a warning. Also that it would have been $160 ticket and 2 points off my license. "You are free to go", is what he said next. I thanked him and pulled off.

Ordinarily I would be all pissed at the cop even though it was my own wrong doing but I have grown up a bit. I also know how hard it is day in and day out for some cops. The good ones that is. So I am more understanding towards them now that I am married to one. I wasn't fan of cops back in the day but I have matured. They also give out this pamphlet where it tells you about fairness and equality. It gives you the option of complaints or commendations. I have decided, with the advise of my husband, to write something complimentary and send it in. Now I have a pretty good idea that the mini badge just might be the real reason I got out of that ticket and points. Oddly enough, my last recent run in's with them have been warnings. I am grateful for this but don't want to make it a habit. I have a problem with speed. I should go out and buy a car that only goes to 85 miles per hour, LOL.

So let this be a lesson you guys. No speeding. Obey the laws. Yes, I'm talking to myself also.

Oh and I did make it to my 10 am appointment right at 10 am and upon my departure, I kept a steady speed of 70 mph.

A new day

I'm feeling better, it's a new day and I am looking forward to the rest of the year. My sweet darling husband surprised me with an early birthday present. A year's membership at Gold's Gym. How excited do you think I was? Very excited. I don't think it's a normal reaction to a gym membership but you all know how I have been battling this unwelcomed weight so it was the best gift ever. To make it better for me, he got one for himself so we can work out together. What a thoughtful person. I think he has just gotten tired of me complaining about it for all this time. LOL. Poor thang. Starting Monday, I will be on a new path to my weight loss. I can't wait.

So my team made it into the playoffs. Go Skins! I have faith that they will make it further through. I'm not going to get all crazy and say they will make it to the Super Bowl but I'm just proud they made it thus far. We play today at 4:15 the Seahawks. I'm going to run out and buy me some Yuengling lager since this is the last 2 days before my workout I will consume beer for the game. Put on my faded Redskins tshirt and park myself in front of the Plasma. Oh how I love or HD wall mounted Plasma. It's perfect for the games and movies. This was a good buy for us.

Not sure if some of you new but my girlfriend created a book club. We had a meet today but due to certain circumstances, it has been postponed. I, however, finished the book and I have to say that as long of a novel it was, I found it to be informative, outstanding and a good choice of a read regardless of the length. In short, it's about a black man who grew up living as a white man. His daughter found out after his death and it led her unto a strong desire and determination to find out about her black roots that her father has stripped away from her. I give it an A for detail and content. I give it an B for attentiveness. At some points I felt she was rambling on with stories that I felt had no bearing really on what the book really was about but thankfully, it didn't occur often. My next read is Other People's Skin. Not a selection by the members but I figured I will get it done before they pick a new book. This book is about the self-hatred caused by intra-racial prejudice and the ongoing obsession with skin tone and hair texture among black women. I have a coupon for 30% off a book at Borders so I am going to head out and get this book I want to add to my collection.

Have a wonderful weekend friends.

Fear of the unknown

Let me start off by saying I had a truly wonderful holiday. Sunday before New Year's I got together with some friends to pre-celebrate the upcoming holiday. I enjoy very much spending time with my friends and this was another year well spent celebrating.

My title is just that. Fear of the unknown. I often wonder about the many fears of a person. Some fear heights, snakes, spiders, etc. I on the other hand fear death. I have come to notice that as I get older, I am concerning myself with it more often. I wonder if it is because I enjoy my life to the fullest that I am afraid of it ending abruptly? Or is it because I'm getting older and know that my days are numbered? Thinking back to when I was younger I don't have any recollection of even pondering over the subject. I mean I had the occasional deaths of the neighborhood boys but it never triggered a response in me. As far as my family, I only had the death of my cousin and more recently, my stepfather. I have had some distant deaths of two cousins recently but no one that was extremely close to me other than my stepfather. I try to grasp some sort of comforting notion that will satisfy my need for a cure to my fear. My husband believes that I need to have my faith restored in an attempt to help me get pass the fear. Will that really help? Would seeing some sort of counselor really help? It's written in stone in my brain that fears cannot be conquered. I know this to be untrue as I once was terribly afraid of airplanes but no longer. So if I can win that battle then shouldn't it be as equally easy to get over my fear of dying?

I don't go to funerals. I am not one to care what another thinks but for some strange reason I am embarrassed by this confession. Not so much because I think someone would laugh or think it's ridiculous but mainly because it's identified with "paying your respect" for the departed. I was present at my stepfather's funeral and I can't begin to put down in this blog the unimaginable pain I suffered that day. It's a two part fear I have with death. Mines and my loved ones. The unknown reflects my own death. You hear stories about after life and judgement day to try to prepare one for what's to come. Are we really prepared? It's the unknown. We don't know what's one the other side. We don't know what it is like to take that last breath of air into our lungs before leaving this earth. That there is what I fear most. I have heard the term many times about fearing the unknown. To me, that applies to everything else except dying. I haven't visited my stepfather's grave since the day they lowered him into the ground. I so badly want to go but just can't bring myself to do it. Which leads me to the next statement. Will I have the same reaction towards my mother or father's death? Is that selfish of me to not confront it head on so that I can be strong enough to visit the grave's?

I am blessed that my parents are healthy. I'm blessed to have my health and my family has theirs too. My mind wanders and it debates the pros and cons to which would be easier to handle. Sudden death or a long slow death of a loved one. On one hand you have time to prepare mentally, I guess, and get to spend all the time you have left with that person. On the other hand, you hold on to a false hope that they may one day get better. Sigh......

I wish I had answers to the questions in my head. It's is rare that I have to reach out to another person for advice or consolation but as the days go by, I struggle more and more to develop some sort of connection with someone who can help me with my fears and concerns.

Thanks for listening. I get like this every now and then and just need an ear. Goodnight.